Cognitive Dissonance

by TijaD

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about

Stylistically, “Cognitive Dissonance” constitutes darkened prog alternating with blatant outburst of metal. As most of the songwriting was done on acoustic guitar, fingerstyle guitar parts form the backbone of most recordings. The story line could be viewed as a modern day version of the Orpheus myth. The unnamed protagonist has a bleak and introverted personality plagued with sinister daydreams and visions of doom. It all starts innocent enough with a high school crush. Although no words are exchanged he falls deeply in love with the girl sitting next to him in class. She in return shows no signs of affection as she spends her time sleeping and feeling miserable. As she drops out from high school his world crumbles and he enters a new life filled with liquor and feverish lucid dreams always with his love at his side. When all seems lost he does find his lost bride, not in the underworld, but in the red light district. As he enters the little red lighted room with a trembling hand reaching out for her, the little sanity still left in his mind quickly vanishes...

credits

released September 17, 2015

Cognitive Dissonance was recorded with the great help of Sander Pastoor (vocalist and bass player of Libethra) on drums and growls and Hanneke Rolloos who can be heard singing on the track “Duet with the Dead”. Roel de Haan can be heard playing the part of cynical psychiatrist on the track “Hiatus” The remaining instruments (guitar, keys, bass and clean vocals) were done by Tijad.

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about

TijaD Rotterdam, Netherlands

Progressive rock and metal enthusiast Tijad was guitarist of the Dutch black metal band "...of Melancholy Burning" and started the metal band Libethra in 2011. Tijad's solo recordings reflect his old love for progressive rock and neoclassical music but are also sometimes infused with the less polished sounds of metal. ... more

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Track Name: Mister Black
At the end of reason
the earth still sucks the rain.
When our final thought is silenced
the winds will not refrain
spreading our ashes while god is playing dice.

Mister Black
his hands are trembling
turning a page
he always smells like booze
this classroom is his cage.

Next to me
Michelle is sleeping
her arms slightly bruised
everybody knows
except for Mister Black.

Golden tears
these wonder years
are passing by
I wave at them and smile.

While at school
I fill my notebooks
by drawing lines;
a sketch of mortal life.
A circle wouldn’t do.

This line here
is my horizon
it‘s also you;
unapproachable.
There’re things I cannot do.

Golden tears
these wasted years
are passing by
I wave at them and smile

Waiting, I’m waiting, waiting for you to wake.
All is easy when you’re seventeen.
Track Name: Demons
Mother Mary came to me
with folded hands
bidding me
to led you be

Keep your demons close
know your demons
Keep your demons close
know your demons

I was only watching you
so innocent and small
I watched your chest
rise and fall

Keep your demons close
know your demons
Keep your demons close
know your demons

Lord forgive this fallen soul
the lines on his hands
I can’t decide
on how this ends

Keep your demons close
know your demons girl
Keep your demons close
Hold me close

You did maintain your innocence
since you were oblivious
to the pain you’ve caused
like a succubus

Keep your demons close
know your demons
Keep your demons close
know your demons

Mother Mary came to me
while shedding tears of blood
So far from home
so far from God

Keep your demons close
know your demons girl
Keep your demons close
Hold me close
Track Name: Dropout
Did you ever notice how nobody listens
how they chatter like tone-deaf birds
I worship the ground you walk
I love how you never talk

Ooh there’s something bright in you, a shimmering light in you.
In darkness I see you holding me.
You walked out so gracefully taking the best of me.
Now I now there’s no light just a tunnel.

Ooh just like an angel there she goes away. Just like an angel there she goes away.

Ooh there’s something bright in you, a shimmering light in you.
In darkness I see you holding me.

Ooh I am leaving, there is no purpose to this place.
Underachieving there’s no excuse to show my face
Only dust and bones
Track Name: Hiatus
Lucid dreams replaced my life.
That is why I closed the curtains.
That is why I close my eyes.

My life is one big celebration please don´t say it is not real
My life is one sweet invitation that I take with both hands
Walking by your side, running through the night
what a brilliant sight two hearts so intertwined wouldn’t you agree?

“Indeed in psychology lovesickness is not considered an actual syndrome, but in severe cases it can lead to mental illness. From my experience I know that pathological lovesickness often co-occurs with a misplaced sense of self-importance as is thanatophobia, the fear of dying. Self-indulgent tendencies or a slight self-fulfilling bias are not necessarily problematic but one should not actually believe that your life or your heartaches truly matter or that anyone should care.”

My life is one big celebration please don´t say it is not real
My life is one sweet invitation that I take with both hands
We watch the rising tide, a seagull in its flight.
I write your name in the sand because nothing lasts forever wouldn´t you agree?
Track Name: It's On Me
You look just the same, just a little paler
the girl I loved for two long years.
So much of you revealed; the subjects of my wonderings,
are softly pressing to the glass.

It is on me, it is all on me I’ll pay the price you name to love you, just for this day.

When I caught your eyes, I saw a slight resentment.
I always thought you never knew.
Knew that I had prayed, consumed by all these longings
I reached out to your heaving chest.

It’s on me, it’s all on me I’ll pay the price you name to love you, just for this day.
Track Name: The Police Report
The teenage prostitute that, has been missing, for three days in a row now, has this morning been recovered. Police officials told us she was buried in the sand.

I am I am I am on the radio.

That quiet beach served as a graveyard. The rising tide made her, sandy gravestone tumble in. He wrote her name on it, using seashells, and now he is in custody for questioning.

I am I am I am on the radio.
Track Name: Duet With The Dead
I loved you,
too much of that potion will poison you.
That be true,
but I never chose to fall in love with you.
I felt so weak and I could not speak.
I should have told you there’s always a way home
but my mind got overflown.

Whilst you’re caught in a mortal coil,
it’s not love you should pursue,
but wholeness and harmony.
All longing ends in pain.

I remember sitting next to you in class
I remember everything except who I was.
I loved the quiet when we were taking a test.
It was the only time that I could rest.

Whilst you’re caught in a mortal coil,
it’s not love you should pursue,
but wholeness and harmony.
All longing ends in pain.

I loved you,
had I brought you home I might have rescued you
that be true.
But I went insane by the sight of you,
changed by colored light. Still I knew your skin was white.
I should have told you there’s always a way home
but my mind got overflown.

Whilst you’re caught in a mortal coil,
it’s not love you should pursue,
but wholeness and harmony,
All longing ends in pain.

I didn’t like it but it was better than working the streets,
working hard to for fill the eldest of needs
I recognized you and I felt so exposed
It was about the time that I overdosed.
Track Name: Cognitive Dissonance
The God-creator no doubt meant us well
but there seems to be no limit to the boundaries of hell.
Still you feed on hope.

Hope is like a sweet wine
best served at an early age
if the music stops untimely
there’s still a memory of its taste.

So susceptible to trauma is the mind of men.
This memory will consume you like a lion does a lam.
Still you feed on hope.

All the things that happened
are like objects that I locked away, in a casket in a dungeon
far from the light of day.
Still I miss you

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